Learning to love ourselves at any size can often be such a complicated thing to do, especially living in a society that has what I like to call “Fat Phobia”. When a person is Curvy, Fat, Voluptuous, Chubby, Fluffy or whichever other term is used to describe those of us who dear to be over a size 6, persons often automatically assume they are lazy, greedy, unhealthy, irresponsible etc. Fat shaming comes in many forms and varying degrees and admittedly as much as we try to put on a brave face it often does cut pretty deep. It’s the reason that loving your body can be such a challenge in today’s world, especially for curvy women, when there is so much noise out there telling you that you need to change your body.
Although being plus size is becoming more positively publicized, it is not where we need it to be just yet. Many of us have bought into this notion that to love your body, and your life, you have to change your body. Dare I challenge that thought though, and say that in order for us to make any healthy lifestyle changes and truly be happy, we must first accept ourselves as we are. This goes not just for plus sized ladies, its for everyone. In order to live your best life there has to be acceptance and love of one self as you are. As long as you are making healthy choices, exercising and doing the things you love, you will be a much happier person.
Its important to note that there is no one size fits all rule to figuring out how to accept and love the skin your in. My own journey was a long and tumultuous one but in the end it came down to:
Drowning Out The Noise: Listening to what everyone has to say can be distracting and damaging. Even those around us that mean us well often impose their opinions on what they believe is right and its often to the tune of, “You would look so much better if you just lose some of the weight”. Find ways to drown out the noise, so your able to hear your own thoughts. For me that’s always been a morning walk with my headphones on. It always helps to clear the clutter in my mind and bring forth my own voice clearly. It allows for me to not only keep my body physically active but also makes for a good mental workout each morning. With mental clarity I have been able to find self-acceptance and start a journey of self love.
Positive Affirmations: There are many of us that may think doing daily positive affirmations are corny, and admittedly , I felt so when I first started them as well. They work though for any and all areas of our life. The simple truth is that you get out of life what you put in and if your filling your mind with negative thoughts then best believe you will spend most your days feeling miserable and as though nothing is going right. You need to look at yourself in the mirror daily and say “I love you” to every body part if you have to, even if you very strongly feel otherwise. It feels corny at first, but this is the only body you’ve got, so you might as well appreciate it. And don’t feel discouraged if you don’t immediately feel more confident. It doesn’t come overnight, but if you keep working at it eventually you’ll believe it.
Dressing for Comfort: One of the most important things to accepting our bodies is knowing how to dress for our body types, knowing what makes us comfortable. This goes for all sizes and shapes. Society will often want to have us feel that big girls should wear big clothes and for years this was reflected in the type of clothes that most stores made available for us big ladies. I for one know that I personally don’t look good nor do I feel comfortable in baggy clothes. It does nothing for my figure and I do love to show my figure, regardless of the size. With the shifts within the fashion industry there are way more fashion choices available for us plus ladies and I would advise us all to take advantage of that. Take the time to truly define what styles your comfortable in, rid your closet of all the items that make you feel less than confident when you wear them and build that wardrobe that makes you feel like your best self. Items that fit just right, that compliment our figures and colors that lift our spirits and that make you comfortable stepping out does wonders for our self confidence.
Learning to love our curves and be our best selves is not necessarily an easy task to accomplish. It takes dedication to self and some amount of effort, but trust and believe that once you have gained self-acceptance and found self-love, you begin to live a whole different type of life and you become almost a whole new person.
Take it from Real Curves… “Embrace the Real You”.